The superior man sets his person at rest before he moves; he composes his mind before he speaks; he makes his relations firm before he asks for something. By attending to these three matters, the superior man gains complete security. But if a man is brusque in his movements, others will not cooperate. If he is agitated in his word, they awaken no echo in others. If he asks for something without having fist established relations, it will not be given to him. If no one is with him, those who would harm him draw near.

Given time to favorably outstanding persons. But also for other people it also is fruitful. It will be carried out conceived, it will be paid made. And you can assist another. The certain business charged to you will turn back personal benefit for you. To you also are going to make the favourable offer. Your desire will be executed, not without the help of the higher person. There is an opportunity essentially to correct for the financial business, and in the near future.

31. Conjoining (xián). Influence

Advise

Opposite spirits are allied, so harmony is born.

The Judgement

Influence. Success. Perseverance furthers. To take a maiden to wife brings good fortune.

The Image

A lake on the mountain:
The image of Influence. Thus the superior man encourages people to approach him by his readiness to receive them.

1. The influence shows itself in the big toe.
2. The influence shows itself in the calves of the legs. Misfortune. Tarrying brings good fortune.
3. The influence shows itself in the thighs. Holds to that which follows it. To continue is humiliating.
4. Perseverance brings good fortune. Remorse disappears. If a man is agitated in mind, and his thoughts go hither and thither, only those friends on whom he fixes his conscious thoughts will follow.
5. The influence shows itself in the back of the neck. No remorse.
6. The influence shows itself in the jaws, cheeks, and tongue.

Softness tames force. Harmony, a reasonable compromise is in business. Feelings and thoughts are pure, elation is growing. You can proceed without fear of a new business. Any union, marriage, friendship, partnership are auspicious. Rely on relatives in difficult situations. Focus on the experience and advice of someone wiser.

The name of the hexagram means "universal," "general," and in a figurative sense "to influence," "to stimulate." The upper trigram is Tui, the Joyous; the lower is Kên, Keeping still. By its persistent, quiet influence, the lower, rigid trigram stimulates the upper, weak trigram, which responds to this stimulation cheerfully and joyously. Kên, the lower trigram, is the youngest son; the upper, Tui, is the youngest daughter. Thus the universal mutual attraction between the sexes is represented. In courtship, the masculine principle must seize the initiative and place itself below the feminine principle.

Just as the first part of book 1 begins with the hexagrams of heaven and earth, the foundations of all that exists, the second part begins with the hexagrams of courtship and marriage, the foundations of all social relationships.

THE JUDGMENT

The weak element is above, the strong below; hence their powers attract each other, so that they unite. This brings about success, for all success depends on the effect of mutual attraction. By keeping still within while experiencing joy without, one can prevent the joy from going to excess and hold it within proper bounds. This is the meaning of the added admonition, "Perseverance furthers," for it is perseverance that makes the difference between seduction and courtship; in the latter the strong man takes a position inferior to that of the weak girl and shows consideration for her. This attraction between affinities is a general law of nature. Heaven and earth attract each other and thus all creatures come into being. Through such attraction the sage influences men's hearts, and thus the world attains peace. From the attractions they exert we can learn the nature of all beings in heaven and on earth.

THE IMAGE

A mountain with a lake on its summit is stimulated by the moisture from the lake. It has this advantage because its summit does not jut out as a peak but is sunken. The image counsels that the mind should be kept humble and free, so that it may remain receptive to good advice. People soon give up counseling a man who thinks that he knows everything better than anyone else.

1

A movement, before it is actually carried out, shows itself first in the toes. The idea of an influence is already present, but is not immediately apparent to others. As long as the intention has no visible effect, it is of no importance to the outside world and leads neither to good nor to evil.

2

In movement, the calf of the leg follows the foot; by itself it can neither go forward nor stand still. Since the movement is not self-governed, it bodes ill. One should wait quietly until one is impelled to action by a real influence. Then one remains uninjured.

3

Every mood of the heart influences us to movement. What the heart desires, the thighs run after without a moment's hesitation; they hold to the heart, which they follow. In the life of man, however, acting on the spur of every caprice is wrong and if continued leads to humiliation. Three considerations suggest themselves here. First, a man should not run precipitately after all the persons whom he would like to influence, but must be able to hold back under certain circumstances. As little should he yield immediately to every whim of those in whose service he stands. Finally, where the moods of his own heart are concerned, he should never ignore the possibility of inhibition, for this is the basis of human freedom.

4

Here the place of the heart is reached. The impulse that springs from this source is the most important of all. It is of particular concern that this influence be constant and good; then, in spite of the danger arising from the great susceptibility of the human heart, there will be no cause for remorse. When the quiet power of a man's own character is at work, the effects produced are right. All those who are receptive to the vibrations of such a spirit will then be influenced. Influence over others should not express itself as a conscious and willed effort to manipulate them. Through practicing such conscious incitement, one becomes wrought up and is exhausted by the eternal stress and strain. Moreover, the effects produced are then limited to those on whom one's thoughts are consciously fixed.

5

The back of the neck is the most rigid part of the body. When the influence shows itself there, the will remains firm and the influence does not lead to confusion. Hence remorse does not enter into consideration here. What takes place in the depths of one's being, in the unconscious mind. It is true that if we cannot be influenced ourselves, we cannot influence the outside world.

6

The most superficial way of trying to influence others is through talk that has nothing real behind it. The influence produced by such mere tongue wagging must necessarily remain insignificant. Hence no indication is added regarding good or bad fortune.

The luck and success should accompany now to you owing to that sincere condition in which you stay. You now " on a wave " success. Here - here there will be some the unexpected events very favorable for you, almost each your step will bring success. Results will be those, that you and do not imagine now; it will introduce rest and the world in your soul. However after all excitements and experiences you, probably, will need to leave for a short while from affairs and to have a rest.